Preparing for Pregnancy, part II

Part II: Some Practical Steps

You have thought it through and both you and your spouse are sure that you are ready to add a third member to the party: you are ready to get pregnant. Well, you first step is to keep thinking and assessing and especially praying, making sure, as I said in part I, to share with your insights and learning with your spouse.

Your second step (actually there is no particular order to the steps at all, you can and should do them all simultaneously) is to start getting some of that learning. Start finding and reading some books on pregnancy and child birth, and of course you can find an abundance of information on the internet. Also, talk to people that have been pregnant and ask them what their experience was like. What were the challenges and how did they overcome them? What were the joys? A word of caution on both bocks and friends: everybody has a different opinion because everybody’s story is different. The point here is to gain a wide breadth of information to help you prepare for as many potential pregnancy scenarios as possible. Some books I recommend are:

Husband-Coached Childbirth, by Dr. Robert Bradley. This book is a bit dated (ok, quite a bit dated) and Dr. Bradley is NOT a fan of medication in childbirth. To be fair, the drugs used when he first wrote the book are different than they are now, and whether to use medication or not is up to you. I appreciate this book for the physical and breathing exercises it lays out as well as for his advocacy of a calm, meditative environment for childbirth. Get this book early so you can begin working together on the exercises as soon as possible. There is more information on “The Bradley Method” here: http://www.bradleybirth.com/

The Pregnancy Journal, Revised Edition : A Day-to-Day Guide to a Healthy and Happy Pregnancy, by A. Christine Harris. This is another book to get early on so you can follow the developmental process of the baby inside Mom. There is room to take notes so you can remember this time (it feels like you will never forget it when you are going through it, but you will) and has tips on how to deal with the different challenges at different stages.

Pregnancy : The Ultimate Week-by-Week Pregnancy Guide (You & Your Baby), by Laura Riley, M.D. The author is an OBGYN and is, as the name suggests, a week-by-week reference to your pregnancy. What is particularly helpful about this book are the numerous illustrations.

Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy. This one is more academic and because it covers a lot of things, including things that could (but probably won’t) go wrong, it can be a bit scary, but still, it is detailed and is very helpful in that way.

Pregnancy Sucks: What to Do When Your Miracle Makes You Miserable, by Joanne Kimes and Sanford Tisherman. I didn’t read this book, but my wife did and she enjoyed it quite a bit, especially since her pregnancy sucked and nobody seemed to understand that.

There are a plethora of other books available on this subject. Check out http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/books/ for a good list. Another valuable resource is your hospital. Most hospitals put on classes for both parents as they prepare for baby and you really MUST attend these. Also, never be afraid to ask the doctor who is following you through the pregnancy. This bit of advice is for Dad’s too, who should make every effort to attend the appointments.

Another thing you will need to do is get physically ready. Mom’s weight is obviously going to change during the pregnancy (if it doesn’t something is wrong) and it is important to be as close as possible to a healthy weight before you get pregnant; the healthier your body is the easier this is going to be on all three of you. Eat a balanced, nutritious diet and stay away from sugar. I recommend you stay away as much as possible from processed foods as well, but don’t get to fanatical about this one, sometimes you just need something microwaveable. Also, be sure you keep (or start) exercising. This doesn’t have to be extreme, but a brisk walk for 30 minutes a day or so will really make a difference in the coming months. When Mom’s body begins to feel all achy the swimming pool is a wonderful place to exercise.

This may be the time to quit certain things too. If you are your spouse smokes, for example, it’s time to let that go. Quitting smoking is stressful, and so is having a baby. Therefore, the best way to do it would be to take care of the one (smoking) before attempting the other (baby). If you are used to drinking fairly frequently it’s time to begin cutting back on that. Not only will this help you be in better physical condition, but it will be easier when the time comes to stop drinking altogether. It is important that both spouses participate in this, it is not fair for mom to have to try and do these lifestyle changes on her own.